I’m a pretty honest person. I mean I lie, who doesn’t but usually, it’s the tricky kind of lie, an omission or a little white lie to prevent feelings from being hurt. But I have never understood how someone can continue to lie once they’ve been caught. Not only are you disrespecting me by blatantly lying, but you’re insulting my intelligence!
I met a guy who was incredibly charismatic. Unfortunately, the reason he put on a show of charm and airs was that he was a textbook player. We met in a club when he came to our booth with his friends to introduce himself, and we decided we would be cordial and offer them a drink. That’s probably when things took a left, and I probably should have stuck to my guns about taking numbers at the club. You see, he asked for my number, but he couldn’t put it in his phone (yeah, I know huge red flag), so he told me his friend was going to take my number… Now there’s only one reason why a guy can’t take a number in his phone
1.If its dead
2. If his girlfriend or lady friend is around
So I called him out on that, and he denied it to my face, and maybe he was right to insult my intelligence because he still ended up with my phone number even though I was reluctant to give it to him because I had made a commitment to meet guys and give people a chance only a few weeks prior. When he actually decided to call and text I followed my gut and ignored the call, only to wonder if I was too hard on the guy and so I gave him a chance the next time we saw each other…
Fast forward to a month later, when it became evident that he had multiple girls he was seeing, which wasn’t a problem that’s how casual dating works; the lying was the problem! See when you’re single you really don’t owe anyone anything, that’s the truth. If you respect someone you show that respect by being honest, or acknowledging that their feelings are valid and creating boundaries, these are the things that I do when I meet a guy because I can’t pretend he’s the only one ringing off my phone, even if he is the only one I would seriously consider being around.
But I’m not a great pretender, I’m also really honest with my feelings (maybe too honest) so I told him what I knew, and although he tried to deny it, he realized there was no point, I really did know too much. You would have thought that would end the lies right? Wrong!
In the end, I would have happily continued a friendship with him because he’s very similar to me in many ways (minus being a lying ass liar), but I had to walk away from even a friendship because the respect wasn’t there.
People let me make it easy for you – when you disrespect someone (and it is unintentional) accept that their feelings are valid and while you may have not intended to do so your actions brought about this result. Apologize, be sincere, and don’t do that shit again!